Further top tips on how to build willpower

I am going to add in two more top tips today to keep you going over the weekend.

The second of my top tips on how to build will power and discipline is an obvious but definitely a powerful one. Get expert help and assistance to get you on the way. If it is exercise you want to crack - visit a personal trainer. If you can not afford the one-to-one help, take a class. If it is behaviour you want to crack then visit a life coach, counsellor or consider cognitive behavioural therapy. You still get some invaluable individual input and guidance there that will further support your ability to succeed in your mission. At the very minimum - spending the money might actually mean you go to the class or meeting as opposed to thinking about it but not doing it. The class or meeting goes into your diary and it becomes a habit - something you do for you and to change what you want to change.

My third tip is also a powerful one- establish a clear vision and a goal and write it down. One friend I know did a large composite picture with images from magazines and words. She pinned it inside her wardrobe door so she saw it every morning as she got dressed. It recommitted her to her goal on a daily basis.The vision was of a beautiful beach body, bikinis and dresses she would like to wear and her ideal (a slim fitting wedding dress) plus words and thoughts that spoke to her about achieving this goal. It really helped her focus on what her aim was - to get the body and weight for a dream wedding dress and honeymoon. It really worked for her and, lo and behold, she looked amazing on her wedding and honeymoon.

An exercise that I do when I have a goal I want to achieve which needs to be done over a time period - works like magic - it literally pulls you into your future. So I am going to share it. Get a sheet of paper. Establish your goal and the date 'BY WHEN' you want to achieve it. Put this date at the top of the page and the goal. Then working your way backwards down the page (by months or weeks depending on the time period concerned) mark a timeline with milestones. The milestones need to be tangible things that you would have to achieve in order to meet your goal. Work backwards in this way until you get to today. What you will see at the end it a magic path to your end goal. You then need to write out a commitment to reaching this goal and sign and date it. If it is a joint goal then you both do it.

Now here comes the magic. You could stick it up and refer to it and follow it religiously and you will get to your goal - for sure. However I have done this on many occasions and rather than looking at it and following it I have stuck it in the drawer. I have found it six months later only to realise that I had not only reached but also exceeded the goal. The very act of making the plan and the route to it has made it happen.

Whatever choice you make to reach your goals give yourself structure, support and the will to succeed and anything it possible.

How to build willpower - Top Tips.

Yesterdays blog on willpower got me thinking about how one builds up self discipline if you feel you simply do not have any or are weak in this area. We all do not have a martial arts expert living next door who can train us by painting his fence! So I will be gathering some top tips on how to train yourself to develop the willpower to adhere to behaviour changes.

One of the most important things anyone can do is to get support to make these changes. Share with your loved ones and friends around you and request that they support as opposed to sabotage your plans to make changes to your life. So make the requests and see that you get no more of the - "Oh go on, you can just have a small cake", buying you chocolates, inviting you round for calorific dinners and getting upset when you do not want to eat them or pouring you extra glasses of wine you did not ask for. Yes - we have all been there!

What you want is your loved ones' support and encouragement to keep going in the right direction. So simply ask for it. You have no idea how powerful this support can be. You will not even mind some gentle chiding when you slip back. So let them know and let them hold you to it. It is much harder to slip back when you have your support network behind you reminding you what you are aiming for. So go on and start sharing and see what happens.

Be warned that some people close to you will not like you making changes. They may be quite attached to the 'old you' and will not be supportive. Often this is not malicious and is a subconscious desire but sometimes it is more overt than that. Watch out for the toxic people around you and if needs be, ditch them. You may have to work hard to gain this support. This in itself is a good thing. It will affirm your desire to change and help confirm who your real friends are. Good luck with this - I am already working on it!

How to build willpower?

The definition of willpower is "the ability of one to control one self and determine one's actions". I think on this basis we could all benefit from a bit more of this in many areas of our lives. The question is how does one get this?

Well it really starts with determining just how much do you want it. Then you have to practice and practice to change habits and attitudes little by little in order to move yourself towards achieving what you want. The idea is that the gradual moves towards it will start to show you the benefits and spur you on whilst making you realise how much you want it. Eventually you will be living it.

Last night I did my second Pilates and Zumba double bill - with the lovely Tanith Lee in Haywards Heath. I genuinely thought I would struggle and feel rubbish. In reality it was a joy and I felt great - all hot and sweaty but still got that glowing sense of wellbeing today. So - guess what - I want to go again on Thursday. Slowly but surely change is creeping in. My willpower is growing with it. Why not take a look and make a list of what you want in your life. What changes could you make to push yourself (bit by bit) towards that goal. How can you build your determination and incentive to actually go for it and reach it?

Anyone get anymore good ideas about how to build will power - please share?

Will you or won't you - the value of willpower.

You must all read a book I have just read for my Book Club - "The monk who sold his Ferrari". It is basically a very insightful guide, loosely written as a story, to teach readers about tips to enable you to achieve enlightenment and joy in all areas of your life. Who doesn't want that???

One of the tips really struck home for me - the need to incorporate or develop your willpower and to bring discipline into your life. The value is endless. It comes out in your relationships and the message it says about you - this is a women or man who always sticks to their word. It says you are an achiever. It will also help you to achieve your plans and goals.

Can you avoid eating that chocolate bar and have an apple instead? Can you say no to that extra hour in bed and get up for a morning run before breakfast? Just think how much extra energy and fitness it can bring to your life. I know in the past I have had an cast-iron will to achieve things- children and inevitable tiredness may have eroded it but I know I can get it back.

What about you: can you stick to your goals and aims? I will talk about developing discipline more this week so come and visit again tomorrow....

Exercise to relax - yes really!

I tried a new form of exercise at the start of last week (Zumba) and it really did make a difference. After just a couple of classes I felt better - tired but glowing with a sense of wellbeing. I really did sleep better that night, whereas on the nights I did not exercise I struggled to get the urge to sleep at all. I felt more motivated to eat well to maximise the benefits and I also felt calmer and more relaxed.

I am now committed to a four week programme - it is not going to be hard to do it as I actually feel motivated by the benefits. I also really enjoyed the Zumba Class. So why not try to get moving and achieve these simple benefits for yourself. Even just a walk to the shops rather than a car ride could get that sense of wellbeing started.